Thankful...

I so enjoyed time with family and friends last week. I am a thankful and BEYOND blessed girl. Thankful for friends. family. a great husband. food. adoption. Eric. miracles. work. grace. time together. church. discipline. lessons learned. and much more.

But... I am I want to focus on my thankfulness of redemption.

I am doing another Beth Moore Bible study... Esther.  My heart really really wants to be poured into by a more experienced and God-fearing woman... so Beth is it.  Yesterday's lesson blew me away. It was stuff I knew... but was a VERY needed reminder of His great love for me and His amazing redeeming power.  Esther, a young girl chosen to be in the beauty pageant of the universe... competing for King Xerxes' heart and affection... high school drama multiplied by the thousands!!! Hundreds of girls... living together... fighting for the chance to be named QUEEN! Can you say hormones? comparison? self-esteem issues? cat fights? PMS? ... YIKES!

Beth makes us think back to high school... and all our insecurities. Ouch. We all remember those days. Here I am:

Chaser of popularity. Danceline captain. Prom queen. Happy-go-lucky. Loud. Member of the Fab Five. Flirt. Youth group member. Condoner of my friends' actions. Believer of boys' lies. Selfish. Compromiser of my beliefs. Fearful of the future. Driver of a 1990 Firebird. Attender of church camps, mission trips, and retreats.  Insecure. Ashamed of my mistakes. 

I compromised when I should have stood strong. I gave in to lies... when I knew the truth. I was selfish when I should have loved more, given more, and learned more. I ached for attention when I should have sought God.  I stayed quiet when I should have shouted Jesus' truth. I was broken and ashamed most of the time... hiding it as I wore my big Christian smile and pretended to be the goody goody.

BUT... my God is gracious and He is good. He loves me... despite me. HE REDEEMS! He uses sinners... like me. I hurt for the teenage girls I love on each day... I want them to know God's love... not temporary pleasure and popularity - it's worthless. I want them to seek HIM... not everything else. I just want them to know HE is better. FREEDOM and JOY are waiting... 

But... back to Esther. So, Beth wrote something she prayed to God in her quiet time that impacted me. And I echoed it in my prayers... because it is so my heart.  In comparing our amazing God to a king like King Xerxes or the boys/things we gave ourselves to in high school and college... let this ring true in your life today: 

I thank You for being the king of King who GIVES a woman dignity instead of taking it, a righteous King whose commands are always for my good and whose ways are always toward WHOLENESS. 

Thank You for restoring and loving and redeeming. 

We do not have to compete and compare for His love. He is our Husband. He is our Savior. He is our Satisfier. There are no games with Him. There is no beauty pageant... the King is already ENTHRALLED with YOUR beauty! His love for you is great. You are His bride. He will not lie. He will not forsake you. HE WILL NOT FAIL YOU! 

HaPpY bIrThDaY eRiC!!!

Happy birthday to Eric! 

I wish we were with him to celebrate together... but he's 999 miles (for real, I checked the mileage) away from us in Belize City. I wish we could go down there right now and take a huge party- bounce houses and all... and just celebrate HIM! 

I hate that he isn't here yet. I hate I can't give him a big hug and present today. BUT you better believe next year we are throwing the most awesome party EVER for him!!! It's gonna be ballin'! Don't worry... you are all invited! :) 

I hope he has an amazing day. There's not an hour that goes by that I don't think about what he's doing, how his day is going, what he could be thinking about, if he knows he's loved... all those things moms think about... it's just hard because I don't know the answer to the questions. 

I hope he gets to eat cake today. that he is celebrated. that he gets a present. that he gets hug. that people sing him happy birthday. I HOPE...

My son is officially a teenager! - sounds crazy, right? - and I'm so excited to see what that looks like and means for our family! I can't wait to get him home and spoil him rotten! :) 

Happy birthday Eric. You are loved. You will always be loved. 

P.s.  talking about his birthday always gets me teary-eyed... i'm not sure why!! 

November 13th

So... it's a day late. Oh well.

If you like corny love stories... enjoy!!

November 13th... 7 years ago... has always been special to Jacob and me. I just had to tell the story...

So... me and Jacob have known each other since middle school - cute, I know. We were Best Friends Forever! We loved hanging out together. I even rode with him and his brother to school every morning for 2 years... in the Bronco... listening to the yellow MercyMe CD EVERYDAY! Anyways... we were best friends, laughed a lot together, hung out with the church people... and TOTALLY ignored each other at school.  Such is the life of a high schooler.

Although we had secret crushes on each other, I always claimed he was like my brother and just brushed it off - weird now, huh? Well, when I was in the 11th grade and Jacob in the 10th grade... we went on a mission trip to Mexico.  Now... I learned a lot about God on that trip and fell in love with foreign missions while in Mexico.  But... something else happened while on that trip as well... God showed me I was going to marry Jacob!!! AHHH! We were at "The Dump." It was literally a dump... smelly, gross, and full of garbage and starving people. It was the worst/saddest place I have ever been... still.  But, I saw Jacob's heart there... as he ministered to this malnourished little girl - he helped her color, he loved on her, and he told her about Jesus.  As I watched this... I knew, somehow, we would end up together! I was FREAKED OUT! So... we enjoyed the rest of the trip. It included lots of ministry and VBS-ing, shopping at the market, and LOTS of barfing from a bug our entire team caught while there! Fun times.

So... knowing I would end up with Jacob, what did I do? I TOTALLY IGNORED it... as any teenage girl would do. So... I went along with my dance team-ing self, chasing after popularity, and enjoying life. I graduated high school - yay! The summer after my graduation, I was with Jacob and our friend Taylor EVERY SINGLE DAY! We were BFFs! But... I was going to college at UAB, had just made the Golden Girls dance team, and didn't know where life would lead me.  I still liked Jacob (that was a secret known only to me... and everyone who watched us together), but was terrified of LABELS... I didn't want to be boyfriend/girlfriend... because... I was still being a teenage girl.

Life went on, and I started college. I was enjoying myself. Still hanging out with Jacob... but not willing to commit.

Finally... November 13th happened.  We looked a bit like this:

Things don't change, huh? 

So... we were hanging out and we usually ended up talking in the church parking lot for hours on end after our activities. So we talked and talked... and Jacob had had enough. He said, "I'm going to ask you to be my girlfriend one time... and then I'm done. If you aren't willing... I can't hang out anymore." He took this paper I had written a few months early that said "I WILL FIND A GOOD GUY. I WILL DANCE. I WILL SMILE. THE END!" and wrote "just remember 5 years." This 5 years referred to the 5 years of friendship and liking each other that we had endured and the time that he had loved and supported me as a friend.  He got out of the car, threw the paper back through the window and shut the door. Dramatic? YES! 

I was in a dilema. What to do? What to do? 

So, I said "Wait!" I put my hands on the window seal. He came over and grabbed them and... IT WAS OVER!!! You know the music of angels singing that happen in movies when two people fall in love and live happily ever after??? Well, I heard that!   It was magical! I was hooked. We stuttered about... not knowing what to say... and I finally muttered, "why didn't you just hold my hand a long time ago?" Haha!!! We hugged... and the rest is history.

Now... our history isn't all magical and perfect... it's full of craziness, lots of bumps, and beautiful redemption! :) I'm thankful for our story and all we've learned together. 

We now have that piece of paper that started everything hanging in our bathroom with a picture from our honeymoon. We are pretty presh.

Catchin' Up

I think my life might be slowing down for a minute!! Isn't that exciting?

But lately I have been doing some cloggin' at a Halloween show

Did some painting and coordinating for our Faces of Troy interpreting conference! Our students are awesome! It was a great weekend! Here's a picture from our Interpreter Appreciation Day painting activity - they painted the sign for "interpret"! Pretty cool!

Sunday was Orphan Sunday 2012. My best friends sent me this that morning :)

What a good day... Jacob and I got to tell God's story about Eric to our church. It was so awesome to be on stage with my hubs sharing about our adventure. I would like to do that more. There are really no words to explain how blessed I feel to be on this journey with him... he's the best and he so loves the Lord. 

I was so overwhelmed on Sunday with all the emotions and encouragement and peace.  Our pastor had a time of prayer for us and another couple who is adopting in our church.  Prayer is powerful... it just is. When people lay hands on you and pray to the God of the Universe... it's good stuff. It was so awesome to look up and see our youth, our church family, my mom... just lifting us up in prayer. We heard so many encouraging words, got so many hugs, and were given monetary gifts that just blew me away. 

Lately, I have been so overwhelmed with emotion and peace at the same time, it's hard to cry. Sometimes I feel like I need to cry... because things are so touching and sweet and awesome... but I can't. Is that bad? I don't know. So, if you look at me during a supposedly emotional time and you wonder/judge me b/c I'm not crying... don't worry I'm judging myself! haha! 

Also... can I just say that God is using young people in crazy ways! God is doing something... REVIVAL... MINISTRY... WORK! He says go and do and give... and they give! It's incredible! Despite a few big gifts from more experienced (not old) people, the money has come from young people (our age) who are in college and poor or have just graduated and starting out!! It's crazy to see obedience and faith in action and I ADORE it!! I should cry when I open the envelopes from our friends we have met along the way... but I am in such awe and amazement... I just can't.  But... God is good and obedience is best.  So... God is working in our generation. He is moving... and there are many who are striving to follow! Blesses my heart!!! And I just want to scream THANK YOU and buy them each a diamond ring or something... but all I have to offer is some hugs, a thank you, and just praises to God. 

And today, I voted

It's a nerve-racking day for our country. God is Sovereign. He is on His throne. We must humble ourselves and pray for Him to HEAL OUR LAND. And... go vote! :)

ADOPTION UPDATE: We had our 3rd homestudy session yesterday! ONE MORE TO GO!!!! Our homestudy should be complete and written within the next 2-3 weeks!! YAY!!! All of our clearances came back!! We are clean!! Clearances are a big deal and take a while to get back so that is a huge weight off our shoulders! Now... onto getting everything ready for the dossier (pronounced Dos-e-a... not dozzier. haha)!! That means more money and more paperwork! 

This also means that we will hopefully have a picture of Eric soon!!!! I can't wait to see his face!!! His birthday is November 16th... how I wish we could celebrate it with him... that we could love on him and eat cake. Okay... now I'm crying... oops.